What Does It Mean to Be a Submissive Wife in a Christian Marriage?

Last Updated on January 19, 2023 by Avi Steen

Submissiveness in a Christian marriage is an often misunderstood concept. While it can be interpreted as a wife being obedient to her husband, that is not its true meaning. A submissive wife is a woman who recognizes and accepts her husband’s leadership role in the relationship while still honoring God’s authority over them both.

It is about understanding each other’s roles and working together within those roles to create a strong and loving bond between the two of them. By recognizing the importance of submitting to one another out of love, couples can experience deeper levels of intimacy with each other than ever before.

In this blog post, we will explore what it means to be a submissive wife in a Christian marriage and how couples can use this biblical principle to strengthen their union.

woman holding man's hand while looking on scenery of building beside body of water during daytime, submissive wife

How To Be a Submissive Wife to Your Husband

Being a submissive wife to your husband can be both rewarding and challenging. But it is an important role in any marriage. A submissive wife is one who is humble and compliant with her husband. She understands that her role in the marriage is to serve him faithfully and respectfully.

The Role of a Submissive Wife 

Firstly, it’s important to understand what being a submissive wife actually entails. The term ‘submissive’ implies that you are giving over control of certain aspects of your life to your husband.

This does not mean that you are not allowed to have an opinion or voice your thoughts. Rather, it means that you defer to his judgment in decisions about family matters or other areas where you are together as a couple. This could include decisions around finances, parenting styles, and so on. 

It’s also important to remember that the role of a submissive wife doesn’t just revolve around decision-making. Being humble and respectful towards your husband should always be part of the equation too.

That means always speaking kindly to him and refraining from raising your voice when there are disagreements between the two of you. It also includes always showing appreciation for him and his efforts, even if they don’t quite meet up with yours!  

christian wife

How To Be Successful As A Submissive Wife 

So how do you ensure that you are successful as a submissive wife? Put God first. Pray together regularly. Make sure that the two of you are following His word in all aspects of your lives. By doing this, a marriage can become even more harmonious than ever before.


Next, communication is key. Talk openly with your husband about how he would like things done in the home (and vice versa). Make sure both parties feel like their opinion is valued and respected at all times.


Secondly, respect each other’s boundaries. Know when it’s time for one person to take control over something or when another partner should step back from making decisions.

Stop Comparision

Don’t look at other women and how they submit to their husbands. Everyone’s relationship is different and should be respected as so. Focus on what works best for you and your husband


And finally, don’t forget why you got married in the first place – love!

Remind yourselves often why the two of you decided to spend the rest of your lives together. It will help keep things positive during trying times!             

Being a submissive wife can be both daunting and rewarding. But ultimately it comes down to communication between two people who care deeply for each other.

Remembering why you got married in the first place! This will help keep things positive during disagreements while respecting each other’s boundaries. It will also ensure no one feels taken advantage of or disregarded because they’ve chosen this lifestyle together. If both parties work hard at communicating effectively then there’s no reason why being a submissive wife cannot work out successfully!

submissive wives

Is Being Submissive Acceptable?

Being submissive is not something that should be taken lightly. It is a biblical principle and it should be approached with respect for both parties involved.

In a Christian marriage, the husband and wife should strive to have an equal relationship while still honoring God’s word and authority over them both. This means understanding each other’s roles and working together within those roles to create a strong and healthy marriage.

The world does not often honor the role of a submissive wife and many unacceptable practices based on biblical principles have arisen in some cultures. If you are considering being a submissive wife, it is important to understand and practice only biblical principles that honor both the husband and the wife.

Ultimately, being a submissive wife is an act of love – one partner taking the lead with humility and respect while the other offers support within set boundaries. A biblical marriage includes submission and Christian women should strive to be submissive wives who honor God in all that they do.

It is a beautiful model of marriage when the husband and wife work together in perfect harmony. It is not about the woman keeping her “mouth shut” or being a slave to household responsibilities. When done out of love, submission can be an incredibly rewarding way to strengthen marriage and bring two people closer together.

Submissive Wives

The word submissive means under the mission. This applies to a wife who chooses to honor her husband, by accepting his leadership in their relationship. This does not mean that she is not allowed to have an opinion or say in the marriage; it simply means that when there are disagreements, she will look to him for guidance and follow his lead as he follows Christ.

A wife is not the only person in a marriage, therefore biblical submission is multi-directional. The husband is submitting to God’s will over his family and the wife submits to that mission as well. A happy marriage honors this dynamic and seeks to ensure both partners are comfortable and supported within the relationship.

woman standing behind man in black tuxedo, submissive woman

What About My Husband?

But What if My Husband Isn’t a Christian? Do I Still Need To Submit?

The word submission is not solely limited to married women, but it is especially important in Christian marriages. This means that even if your husband does not have faith in Christ, you still need to submit to him as the head of your household.

This may seem difficult at times, however, remember that submission is not about taking orders or blindly following someone else’s lead. The Bible says in Ephesians 5:22 that wives should submit to their own husbands: “Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.” This verse applies both to Christian and non-Christian marriages.

When it comes to a non-Christian husband, the wife is still called upon by God to display submission in her marriage relationship. In this situation, it may be ideal to consult a Christian counselor or family therapist to help both parties understand the role of submission within a marriage.

ring, wedding, love

5 Typical Behaviors of a Submissive Woman

Servant Heart

A submissive woman looks for ways to serve and honor her husband. She listens to him, respects his decisions, and wants to help him in any way she can.

Gentle Spirit

A submissive woman speaks gently, is never rude or argumentative, and will not provoke her husband in public or private. Conversations with her husband are respectful as she demands the same in return.

Protective Attitude

A submissive woman is protective of her husband’s reputation and takes extra steps to ensure his dignity remains intact. She will not gossip about him nor allow anyone else to do so in her presence.

Comfortably Subordinate

A submissive woman is comfortable with her role as the subordinate partner in the marriage, trusting her husband to make the right decision, even if it differs from her own. She does not secretly hope for him to fail in order to validate her opinion.

Godliness and Modesty

A submissive woman strives to live a holy life, modeling God’s ways in all she does, including her behavior in the home. She dresses modestly out of respect for her husband and is aware of the impact her choices have on him.

Ultimately, submission in marriage should be a reflection of our relationship with God. We are called to submit to Him out of love and obedience, which carries over into our relationships with each other. When done right, being a submissive wife can be a beautiful testament to the power of unconditional love.

Christian Wife Scriptures

Submit to Your Own Husbands

“Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.” Ephesians 5:22-24

Be a Submissive Wife In Everything

“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husband, as is fitting in the Lord.” Colossians 3:18

Love Should Always Be Present

“Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.” Ephesians 5:25-27

God’s Word in Your Marriage

“Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.” Colossians 3:16-17

These verses remind us that God should be at the center of all decisions made within a healthy marriage. When we submit to each other, it should look like what Jesus did when He humbled himself and became obedient unto death on the cross (Philippians 2:8).

Submitting to our spouse in marriage is an example of what it means to be a Christ-like servant. Setting aside our own needs and taking a look at how our husband feels and the ability to listen to what he needs is an important part of submission.

The Submissive Wife Focus

We can better understand our husbands when we look to God for guidance and His wisdom for how to live our lives together in harmony. Ultimately, living out the role of a submissive wife will not only make you a blessing to your husband but to all those around you as well.

By following the biblical examples found throughout scripture, we can learn how to properly submit to our husbands and build stronger marriages through God’s grace. As wives, we have the opportunity to strengthen and encourage our husband’s life and to help create a God-honoring and peaceful home.

Submission in marriage is not a one-way street; it is an equal partnership that works best when both partners are fully devoted to each other, and more importantly, to God. While there are many negative connotations associated with the submissive wife, they are ultimately just that – misconceptions. When a wife submits to her husband out of love and respect, it can be an incredibly rewarding way to strengthen marriage and bring two people closer together.

It is up to each individual couple to decide how their relationship works best. Regardless of whether one partner is more passive or dominant, the key is to focus on the love and respect each person has for their spouse, and to work together in perfect harmony.